Just For The Records………..

Pre-Script: The following is an address that I gave on the 25th of April, 2021; at the Anchor Point of the Jolly Rogers deck of the National Association of Seadogs (Pyrates Confraternity). Even as the title of this post implies, it is just for the records.

I want to bark my bellus.

I have held certain grievances for over twenty years now that should eventually begin to concern the Pyrates Confraternity, because I am beginning to hold these grievances against the confraternity also.

Like some seadogs know, I farm as a high school teacher. My principal called me on Thursday morning, concerning the examination scripts of SS3 students — which I had not marked. She sought to have me mark them as soon as possible. Till this minute however, I’ve not been able to mark the scripts; because — even before that Thursday, and ever since then — my parents have been threatening to lock me up in Dr Victor Lasebikan’s psychiatric ward, and therefore my mind has not been settled enough to mark.

Victor Lasebikan is the same psychiatrist that murdered Joke Abiodun (a University of Ibadan MBA graduate) just late last year, due to the type of murderous procedures that he carries out in his hospital. He is said to have murdered even more patients of his that I do not know of, courtesy of these same procedures. Yet, this is the same psychiatrist in whose hospital my parents have been tying me down for over two decades.

Due to this factor and many others, I have made up my mind to disown both of my parents; legally, with a written court injunction. However, the judiciary is presently on an industrial action that has delayed my being able to take my parents to court. But because of their persistent threats of detaining me in Lasebikan’s hospital, I thought it best to seek the help of the Nigerian Police over the issue; and I sought the assistance of Cap’n Hat Ache concerning the issue.

Since then, over ten seadogs have said that they’re too busy to accompany me to a police-station; according to the Cap’n — and over an issue that can take my life, literally; over an issue that is in all its entirety destroying my life.

I am deeply aggrieved.

O Cap’n, I cannot keep on attending pyratical activities or keep on particicoming blindly; as though there’s absolutely nothing going on — and despite all the means via which so many of Ibadan in particular are waging an open war upon my life. And I cannot go to a police-station alone, as they will not attend to me; even as they did not attend to me when I sought their intervention over the issue of a destitute that was dying on the streets, until the day that he eventually black-sayled.

Is it at the of forty-seven years old now, O Cap’n; that I will find it impossible to legally disown parents that have destroyed my life to the vile extent that they have — even if only through their wickedly selfish irresponsibility?! That after almost ten years as a Pyrate, I cannot get the Police to arrest my father on the basis that he has absolutely no right to keep on bundling me off to a lunatic asylum?! That after almost ten years as a Pyrate, I cannot disown parents with a written court injunction — parents that have been so selfishly irresponsible?!

How can it be that after over forty-seven years on earth, I have not met one man — one single man or woman — that can look at me and say with the utmost sincerity,

“Dotun, Ikoro, this is your life. Take it. Live it.”

Like I asked a man that I have known now for over twenty-four years, like I asked him just a couple of days ago, I am this afternoon asking of every man that I have ever known in my life:

“Is it that my father is so powerful, or is it that you’re all such a bunch of lazy cowards?!”

Even for me to change my name is anathema to all the people I know, because you all don’t want to offend my parents! So you all keep on saying that a man in his forties should keep on being tied to the apron strings of his father and his mother, because you must offend neither the father nor the mother! Even if the two of them had proven themselves worthy, does that make any sense — at my age?!

My father’s goons would come to the house and tell him not to lock me up in any hospital — that he should break my neck, rather. My mother said once, lately; that — since I have no means of making money — I should just go and sit down beside the road and be begging. Yet, these are the sort of parents that you all keep on listening to — that you all keep on tying me down under! Are you all such cowards?! Please, O Cap’n; I am deeply aggrieved.

• Ikoro Iyineleda; 27th of April, 2021.

Ibadan.

Post-Script: Obviously due to the anguish reflected in the address above, the Cap’n of the Jolly Rogers deck eventually volunteered to accompany me to the police-station at Alegongo-Akobo. However — despite his presence with me at the station this morning — the Police refused to grant me audience; rather, they began to make the same sort of empty promises to me that adults make to children and lunatics.

Thus, at the age of forty-seven, Ibadan in particular (and Nigeria and its cohorts in general) have destroyed my life to the extent where a psychiatrist at the University College Hospital in Ibadan told me yesterday that I (at the age of forty-seven, when I should be guardian of children sprung from my loins) am still regarded by Psychiatry as being under parents taken to be my guardians. To the extent where the Police will not even grant me audience over the issue of the family that is the major factor in the destruction of my life.

The Nigerian judiciary is said to be on an industrial action due to the decision of mine to disown both of my parents with a legal court action. It has been said by a lawyer that the strike is because they do not want to disgrace my father. For, if a court case with which a high-ranking university professor has his first son strive to make the law decide that the said professor no longer has the right to act as that son’s father — if the details concerning the court case does not grab the attention of the Press, even as the Press keeps on ignoring the noisy fanfare and revelry with which Ibadan in particular destroys my life; then this generation has indeed carried out a murder in Nigeria with the biggest cover-up in all of history.

Let the Nigerian judiciary continue with its industrial action for the next two years if it wants. Even if my father dies before then, I’ll still take him to court posthumously — to let the world know that I never had a father, that I never had parents.

Obviously, that will be a first major step in my over-coming the evil that is destroying my life in Nigeria.